Absolutely no power, but battery is not dead

I'd put money on it being the solenoid. It might be clicking and sticking. Mine did the exact same thing last summer. A new solenoid fixed it. In fact, my solenoid stuck so badly that it melted my battery. I had a brand new Shorai and it went up in an epic show of sparks, fumes and noise. After changing my shorts, I bought a new solenoid and Shorai warrantied my battery. I've no issues since.

Have you replaced the 30 amp fuse with a new one?

so i popped over to Timothy's yesterday (i'm a friend of his and am actually buying it off of him because he's moving out of town) and we got a little more information.
1) we sanded the interfaces of the 30amp fuse, and then checked continuity in multiple ways (on all other fuses as well), so it and the associated connections are definitely still good.
2) we unplugged the engine-ground from the [strike]battery [/strike] edit:engine and cleaned that up, that's fine.
3) the lights started coming on after we would unplug/re-plug the fuse, but they would fade 90% or entirely die as soon as the starter is pressed.
4) we bridged the solenoid with the key (and lights) on, and it would spark and click (sometimes), but would not turn over.
5) we checked the battery with the voltmeter, it read 12+ when the key was off, but as soon as the key was moved to on, and without hitting the starter, the volts would plummet to less than 1.
5a) i JUST found this webpage: ( faq.ninja250.org/wiki/How_to_tell_if_your_battery_is_dead ), and it's giving some great information regarding battery health and volt values...with the takeaway being that our battery is toast despite the resting voltage being over 12v.

we're going to buy a new battery this weekend, the current one is supposedly over 4 years old. hopefully this is the solution, and we don't need to do anything else.
i plan on taking checking the wiring near the key and the starter motor sooner than later.

seanile wrote: ... lights started coming on after we would unplug/re-plug the fuse, but they would fade 90% or entirely die as soon as the starter is pressed... checked the battery with the voltmeter, it read 12+ when the key was off, but as soon as the key was moved to on, and without hitting the starter, the volts would plummet to less than 1.
5a) i JUST found this webpage: ( faq.ninja250.org/wiki/How_to_tell_if_your_battery_is_dead ), and it's giving some great information regarding battery health and volt values...with the takeaway being that our battery is toast despite the resting voltage being over 12v.

we're going to buy a new battery this weekend, the current one is supposedly over 4 years old. hopefully this is the solution, and we don't need to do anything else....

Yes, existing battery is toast, and would fail a load test.

And be sure to also check integrity of the connection where the negative battery cable attaches to rear of engine, as the wire terminal may be corroded or the connection otherwise deficient.

Good Fortune!

thanks for the agreement.
however i did mispeak on your second point; we undid the ground wire where it is screwed into the engine, not the battery. we'll clean up the cables that connect to the battery too just to make sure the new connection has the best chance.

question though, i read a comment in another thread from someone who didn't have a hot reputation for being...truthfully competent i guess. he said that if you plug a battery in without giving it a full charge before trying to use it, then you're setting a ceiling on that battery's chargeable capacity. ie, if we get a [new] battery that has been sitting for a while, and it's got about 75% capacity (i don't even know if that's possible/the right way to describe it), and we don't charge it before using it, then it'll never be able to exceed that 75% point..
that all sounds like a load of bull to me, and that yea it would help to charge it before hand, but it's not necessary. i'd plug it in, get the bike started, and let it run for 20 minutes (if it's not too hot out), then ride it around a bit to encourage it to charge. but i just want to make sure i'm giving it the best chance at a good life

The Kawasaki service manual has an extensive section about the battery & charging.
It says that It's best to give the battery an initial charge before using it in order to ensure long battery life.
It's best to install a good, fully charged battery. To me the motorcycle charging system's job is to maintain a good battery, not to re-charge a depleted one. my current battery is a Scorpion AGM from batterystuff.com. 12.76 VDC straight out of the box. Ctek US 0.8 smart charger & VC97 digital multimeter.

+1 on the AGM battery. My 2000 ZRX1100 came with a Yuasa AGM from the factory, it never saw a charger and worked perfectly to 2010. Yes, ten years on the same battery. I replaced it with another Yuasa AGM. The bike sat unridden from spring 2012 to summer 2013. I cleaned the carbs and petcock and put m.y CTek charger on it over night, and it has not missed a beat. Sixteen plus years on two batteries. I'm sold.

Don't feel bad. I have the same issue with another vehicle if mine ...where it does the same thing. All the electrical works fine, lights radio etc etc. Yet,
as soon as I engage the starter, the battery voltage drops to nearly 1/3 of the resting voltage and the starter motor will not turn the engine over.
Release the starter and right back up to nearly full charge resting voltage.
Total junk battery.

update: it was the battery. the fact that we were checking it with the keys off was why we were so mislead. the solenoid was just not getting enough power to turn the engine over so it was solved with a new battery.

new issue, to be approached at a later date though, two of the four pipes were cold when we did get it running. when you let off the gas it died, but if you held the throttle steady it would stay alive. could be anything though because it sat for a year; carbs, fuel lines, filters, spark plugs...they're all suspect.

thanks for all the help everyone!!