Rampage and aftermath

Well, I've got some minor repairs ahead of me. Pull and replace the 4-1 exhaust with the stock 4-2 setup and rejet, along with some wiring if nothing else.

If you're wondering why I'm making this leap, to make a long story short I got run over last week...sortof. Well...not really but...kindof. :S




It all happened just before noon...(engage the twinkling flashback machine)


I was crossing the street (minding my own business and thinking about cheese and Diet Dr Pepper and that beautiful Triumph T100 I test rode the other day...the usual stuff) when suddenly I heard a loud *CRUNCH* to my 8:00.

The KZ?!

No, *whew*, just somebody in a Buick rear-ending and scraping along the side of some poor guy's brand new 2008 Malibu. But wait...She's now aimed her land yacht of doom at me and ...man...she's flying! GET OUTTA THERE! I threw myself out of the intersection as she flew through the red light at what must have easily been 35mph and *SMASH!*

The KZ?!

No, *whew*, just my girlfriend's Toyota Corolla.

"Hey, you alright?...Hey!...uh...hello?" A blank stare greeted me from the old woman as she started rolling back. Straight through the intersection (again) amidst my demands she stop, she continued to stare at me like she might had I three eyes and a tongue sticking out of my forehead. "Stop the car! Stop! STOP! STOP THE CAR," I yelled. *BANG BANG BANG* was my fist against her hood when *BLAMMO!*

The KZ?!

No, *whew*, just some guy's Dodge pickup. Really, he should have known better than to stop at a red light...what was he thinking??? :dry:

Glancing up at him, I could see the look of unbelieving shock on his face as he looked down to see the Buick of Devastation deeply embedded in the long quarterpanel of his truck when...what's this? Oh! The fun is not over yet! Imagine my look of incredulity as she begins driving forward through the intersection ... again! Well, there was nothing for it. I literally leapt into the window of her Buick Deathwagon, shut it off, took her keys and ran off with them to the other side of the street like a little boy playing some demented game of keep-away declaring "You're not going anywhere!"

*exhale*

The disaster concluded, I took a moment to relax and leaned up against my girlfriend's ruined Corolla. The smell of fuel was thick in my nostrils as that faithful red car she'd driven all though college and 3,000+ miles across the country had literally been thrown up onto the sidewalk like a rag doll (pivoting the rear passenger wheel completely under the car ala "Back to the Future Part II" as it tried to make its way unsuccessfully up the side of the curb) and sandwiched against a tree, popping open the trunk, destroying both rear doors and causing a notable fuel leak.


What occurred then was the true aftermath of this 78 year old woman's rampage of destruction. I can't really put into words the feeling that came over me. Those of you that have experienced it will understand...the rest of you, I hope never will. It was as if I was being called...drawn voicelessly by an unconscious realization. As my head turned slowly to the right, it came into view and everything became all too clear.

I had parked the KZ in front of the Corolla...



It's fared well (far better than when my XS650 was smeared into the ground by some guy in a Hummer all those years back...see my intro post for details). The handlebars are bent. The handgrips on one side torn up and the killswitch on the same side doesn't seem to work at all anymore. The muffler is slightly crushed. The engine covers are scraped up. Otherwise, she still runs and seems largely straight.



So there you have it. My poor bike got knocked over and sat on. Oh, and several other cars were totaled.

You may ask, "What was this woman doing?!". Well, I can't really say other than to comment that the police report(s) make mention of the early stages of Alzheimers.

Hopefully she didn't forget to pay her car insurance premium. Old ladies in Buicks are scary, I can remember my Grandmother at the wheel of her's.

Those things are like tanks! If you weren't thinking about it, you'd never guess to look at her car that she'd just hit three people.

I don't know what it is about old ladies and Buicks, my grandmother always drove them, usually an Electra 225. She used to always say "why I'd drive my Buick to California tomorrow" never mind the fact that she never left Ohio in it. I remember one day she got in the car, started it and heard a screeching sound and then her power steering went out, so she took it to the dealer to get checked out. About an hour later the dealer called and asked her "Mrs. Croxall are you missing a cat" to which she replied "why yes I am how did you know" turns out one of the barn cats crawled up into the warm engine compartment and when grandma started the car he met his demise.:woohoo:

mmmmm, delicious. :laugh:

I've had a chicken try to run me off the road before but I don't think I've ever been able to blame a cat for my engine woes.

Yes, I've had animal related breakdowns. Like the time the dogs trapped a cat under my pickup and literally ripped the wiring harness to shreds... That was a fun day

"A la Back to the Future II" :lol:

I'm a bit confused, I guess. How were you driving the Toyota and the KZ at the same time?

I guess I need a picture. :huh:

Good thing you weren't hurt and were able to stop the carnage without harm to yourself.

Jeez, Virii, It was like I was there, when I read your post.
I got confused about how your bike got hit.... I'm guessing that this all took place on a residential street, and your GF's car and your bike were parked?

I wasn't actually in either.


My counterpart and I were walking across the street at the time, heading towards our respective vehicles which were both parked legally on the side of the road (although one was soon to be parked on top of the other :S )

Basically the force of the massive slab of marble the Buick was carved out of relocated the Corolla. After hitting the white Malibu, the Buick was actually at enough of an angle that the Corolla moved several feet forward and sideways





Clearly it isn't really to scale.

That's the before picture.


I made an after picture:

OMG:ohmy: that is insane. Lucky no one was killed. Reminds of that Southpark episode. Also, the old guy who killed a bunch of people in Santa Monica a few years ago.